These are troubling and anxious times. And yet during the last two weeks, despite all the challenges, my attention has so often been drawn towards the heart-warming connections and feeling of ‘togetherness’ that I have experienced in and around me. I guess you could say that the distance that we are called to keep from one another is actually more of a ‘physical distancing’ than a ‘social distancing’. All around me keep seeing so many signs of social connection; just not in the face to face way that we are used to.  

This week, prompted by the hugely challenging situation in which our country and our world finds itself, Sander van Eekelen and I put our heads and hearts together to write a joint blog.

With the spread of the coronavirus, the serious measures that have been put into place, and the constant news about it in the press and on social media; we are all experiencing what it feels like to be living in highly uncertain times that are moving and shifting at lightning speed. The current circumstances are very challenging, complex and largely unpredictable. And the question we have been asking ourselves is; how do you deal with all that is going on right now in the best possible way?

With all that is going on around me at the moment, I (Jo) was once again reminded last week that it is not my environment, my situation or my circumstance that causes my worry, frustration or stress. It is the thoughts that have about these circumstances and the stuff that is going on, that cause these feelings in me

As you are reading this, I invite you tocall to mind something that you may be finding tough at the moment or something that is stressing you out a bit. 

Too often, I (Jo) still catch myself listening in a conversation so that I can persuade. Not to understand, but to be understood. Waiting for the other to stop talking so I can give my opinion and view.In these moments, I dont even really hear whats being said. Especially when Im so certain of my own view or short on time.

Yet, when I catch myself and stop. Put my views and opinions to one side for a moment. Become present, quietly paying attention to the other. And truly listen from a place of openness and genuine curiosity. Open minded. And open hearted. Amazing things can happen. And quickly. 

Two weeks ago, I (Jo) was struck down by the flu. Three full days in bed - albeit with my laptop and mobile close at hand - I was pretty good for nothing! And then on day four, still weak and shaky, all dosed up to the gills on paracetamolthroat sweets and caffeine I got myself ready to leave for Brussels to speak at a conference for Agile professionals.

As I travelled down on the train, alternating between the sweats and the shivers, switching between looking forward to my session at the conference and wondering why on earth I hadn’t cancelled three days before, I asked myself and indeed my colleagueSander “Am I strong? Or stupid?”

To which he replied… “May be both?!”

 

Is this quote an ‘open door’? A cliché? Maybe! However....

I (Jo) have been ‘practicing’ gratitude for a while now and I am noticing a significant impact on my daily life.

What do I do? Every morning I take just a moment to focus on a few things that I am grateful for. When I’m making my morning coffee, as I wrap up my morning meditation and reflection, or on my way to the office.

Before you start reading this blog, call to mind a situation that is challenging you at the moment. A circumstance that life has 'thrown at you', that you don’t necessarily like, but that you are still having to deal with.

It could be a problem, an irritation, a conflict, a really difficult situation or relationship; something that’s not working for you right now.

And ask yourself: Am I ‘Pushing Against’ or ‘Flowing With’ whatever is going on?

In mijn coachingspraktijk merk ik steeds weer op hoe sterk we als mens zijn geconditioneerd om naar het verleden te kijken als er iets gebeurt in ons leven wat ons niet zint. Of het nu een externe gebeurtenis is die ons overkomt of een bewustwording van eigen ineffectieve gedragspatronen. De aller, allereerste reactie is steevast ‘hoe kon dat nu gebeuren?’ of ‘waarom doe ik dat eigenlijk?’ of ‘hoe is het zo gekomen?’ of uitingen van gelijke strekking.

Transformational Presence heeft alles te maken met het creëren van de beste omstandigheden om een impactvolle, blijvende verandering - transformatie – plaats te laten vinden.

Het helpt ons om het grootste potentieel in mensen, ideeën, projecten en omstandigheden te herkennen en om dat potentieel in de praktijk vorm te geven en te ontwikkelen.

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